, you'll recall that the first habit is "Be Proactive." This blog will chronicle the process of creating and growing my investment company, from its infancy. Hopefully someone will recognize my story in his or her own life, and take the motto of the The First Habit to heart: "Be Proactive."To begin this blog, I thought I'd start with an overview of the recent changes in my outlook and direction that began with my departure from a good, solid job that I was using to systematically destroy myself.
No question - it was a great job! Great salary and benefits at a terrific company with humane leadership and the honorable goal to offer superb products and service to our fighting heroes in the military. I was respected by colleagues and staff alike, and enjoyed a working relationship with some of the finest people I will ever know. No company is perfect, and there were problems at this one, but the real problem was going on between my ears.
I had defined myself by my job. I had no identity outside of the four walls of my office. When asked, "What are your hobbies?" I was hard-pressed to answer. Or "What do you do for fun?" -- "Play with spreadsheets" didn't seem like a satisfactory response. Spare time was spent staring haplessly at the television, trying to recuperate from long hours and (often self-imposed) stress, eating myself into high blood pressure, obesity, and a positively shocking lipid profile. Gone was the vibrant, motivated, effective employee that they had hired. By the end I struggled to maintain a reasonably productive forty hours per week, and took up to a week to recover from the occasional 12- to 15-hour day my job required. I had lost sight of everything that makes me who I am.
I spent money for nothing. I've heard it said that it's easy to tell what peoples' values are by looking at how they spend their money. I considered myself a reasonably generous person, did some charitable giving and opened my wallet to the occasional friend in need. I have a pretty good working relationship with money, and paid my bills on time, saving a portion of my income every month. But I used shopping like a drug, often buying useless trinkets to give my hollow life some apparent meaning. And most of the cash I did save was reserved in - of all things - a savings account!
I neglected the important for the "necessary." Allowing others to define what was necessary was my primary weakness. And it surfaced in accepting too much work, delegating too little work because no one else matched (tolerated) my perfectionist standards, and performing busy work that could easily have been delegated so that I could feel like I was accomplishing something! And throughout my eventual decline in productivity, I ignored or downplayed warning signs and symptoms of very real illness.
My life had become bleak and joyless. My friends were very concerned. My stamina and health were severely depleted. But I kept that job for several (to me) very important reasons:
1. I feared losing the salary.
2. I feared losing the health insurance.
3. I feared no one else would hire me.
4. I knew that it wasn't the job that was the problem - it was my thinking.
The only one of these reasons with any basis in reality was the last one - my thinking had become terrible, broken. But I was powerless to change it under so much (again, frequently self-imposed) duress.
Finally, when my health and conditions at work allowed no other choice but my departure, I took some time to reestablish my footing, and reconnect with what is important to ME. And the result is "The First Habit."
I'll take time in upcoming postings to outline some of the values that are important to me and what literary and other resources have helped me understand them better. I'll describe how I'm putting together my personal mission statement and how it will influence the business I am creating. I'll mention some of the educational resources that I am taking advantage of, and how they are giving me the tools I need to create that business. And I'll probably have an occasional post that describes some of the mental and emotional challenges I'm facing in the process.
I've always been told that to get what you want, find others who have it and do what they did. It agrees perfectly with my experience, and I'm taking that approach from the beginning. Because of that, I know my venture will be successful, I know it's the next part of my happy journey.
My hope is that others will be encouraged to pursue their own dreams, even using my approach as a template if it fits. Likely we'll discover together that education, success, failure, work, perseverance, persistence, and action all go together, creating from each part's melody a powerful synergy with all the vitality of good music. (I'll talk about that again in a future post!)
Thanks for joining me!
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