First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do. - Epictetus
This quote has always had powerful meaning to me. It seems so simple, and yet the wisdom of the ages seems lodged in it.
“Becoming” starts with a Vision of the future, and is followed by a lot of targeted Action. I have never seen this recipe fail, when:
1) The Vision is clear and I believe in it enthusiastically and without reservation.
2) I am willing to evaluate my Actions honestly to make sure they are really on target.
The reason it works is because it’s a different way of stating the Law of Attraction – aligning my thoughts, passion, and actions to a specific Vision draws that Vision to me inevitably. This is not “magic” of some kind; it’s just the way things work in this universe. There are potential problems with this formula, though, and they warrant discussion.
Potential roadblocks permeate that simple statement of the Law of Attraction, among them:
1) Is my Vision clear and focused? If not, the Law of Attraction may not appear to work.
2) Do I really believe in that Vision? If my Thoughts are not truly in alignment (and “belief” often happens at a subconscious level), then the Law of Attraction may not appear to work.
3) Does the Vision really evoke my Passions, or does it evoke the passion of someone else in my life, but not mine? Again – this can make it seem like the Law isn’t working.
4) Am I really taking Action? If I’m fooling myself about being in Action, I’m wasting my time.
5) Am I really being honest about whether the Action I’m taking is working? If I don’t honestly evaluate the Actions I take, I may thwart the Law of Attraction.
When I review that list of roadblocks (and I doubt that it’s even complete), it’s intimidating. What can I do if I don’t even know what my Vision is? – many of us have gotten disconnected from our dreams. How can I know beyond a doubt that I truly believe? How can I wrangle my subconscious mind into submission? What if I don’t know what Action to take next? What if my perceptions about whether an Action is “working” are inaccurate? When I think about all of the questions these potential pitfalls beg, it can be overwhelming – especially to a recovering perfectionist like myself.
There is good news in all of this, though: It doesn’t seem to matter at first whether we are truly convinced of our Vision beyond a shadow of a doubt. As long as we continue to be willing to believe, the Law can work.
Also, even if our Passions are not fully engaged at the outset, still the Law of Attraction can work. What matters is that we are intent on aligning our passions properly.
Finally, it doesn’t even seem to matter what Action we take at first, as long as we take Action. Even the lamest attempts at taking Action seem to yield fruit as long as they are evaluated honestly and we don’t allow “failure” to immobilize us.
There is a powerful Principle in play here, one of that “laundry list” I keep referring to in my posts. That Principle is Willingness. If we are willing to work toward aligning our Thoughts, Passions, and Actions, we will find a way to make that happen. Epictetus’ immortal words, in fact, only make sense in the context of Willingness.
I'll even state it more emphatically: I believe that Willingness is the key to the Law of Attraction. Whatever we would become, whatever we would achieve, whatever we would obtain in this life – if we are Willing to do whatever it takes to become, to achieve, to obtain, our powerful God-given brain will somehow locate the proper Path.
Willingness is so central to my success in life that I often forgo all other goals to refresh my precious reserve of Willingness. When I am discouraged (it happens), when my efforts seem to be failing, when my energy flags, when my “feelings” have deserted me – I fall on my knees and pray “God, please help me to be Willing.”
The power of that prayer in my life is astonishing. I find in those seven words exactly what I need, every time. They bring me to a place of Humility, where I realize that the efforts of my Self-will are always going to be futile. It brings me to a place of Honesty, where I accept the fact that I am responsible, and that it is I who must change, and not my circumstances. And it brings me to a place of Surrender, where I stop fighting that fire in my heart that draws me closer to the Vision of myself that is in proper alignment with the Will of my Creator.
James Arthur Ray, in Harmonic Wealth , demonstrates the power of this when he talks about getting the car of his dreams at a time when he was barely making rent each month. He wanted that Cadillac very, very much – his Passion was aligned with his Thoughts, big time. And his spiritual advisor at the time suggested that he make it a goal to obtain that car in the next six months. But how could he do it? He was stumped as to how to even begin to achieve such an ambitious goal.
He did the one thing that he could think of to do as a first step: He went to the dealership to look at the car. As he sat behind the wheel, he dreamed of it, loved it, cherished it. All good. What to do next?
A salesman asked Ray if he wanted the car, to which he replied in the affirmative; but he explained his financial situation. The salesman suggested leasing, an option Ray hadn’t considered, or even known about. For $150 per month, the car could be “his.” In six days, he had the car of his dreams.
From a pipe dream to fruition, a six-month goal happened in six days. But only because he was Willing to do the next indicated step – a simple visit to the dealership – did the proper path reveal itself. It was not much as “actions” go, but it was enough, because he was Willing.
One might question the wisdom of selecting that specific goal when obtaining the rent each month is a concern. And here’s the point about the Law of Attraction: The Goal doesn’t matter. It’s the process that matters. And Ray learned the process in this simple exercise, and has since learned to apply it in every area of his life. Ray’s spiritual guide understood this: Start with what you are passionate about – whatever it is – and learn the process in a context of absolute Willingness. Then learn to apply it to other goals. It’s as simple (and difficult) as that.
At long last, with all the Principles in place, my next post will start shedding light on my own Vision, Mission, and Goals. Stay tuned!
6 comments:
In my experience, people who lack will, or willpower, are hardest to help (and sometimes I lack willpower, too, which makes it hard to help myself, as well). I think of it as a kind of sloth: when you're too lazy to WANT something, you can forget about getting it. And some people don't want ANYTHING. They may say they want money, or a lot of free time, or fame, but it's only wishing, which can be very far from willing.
Thanks for your comment, Ivan!
For me, there is a powerful distinction between Willpower and Willingness. Willpower is aligned with what I call “Self-will” – the efforts of my Ego to drive life. Willingness, by contrast, is allowing the Ego to be set aside.
The difference is same as the difference between the two verbs “try” and “allow.” I have heard it said that the word “try” should be banished from our lexicon, in favor of the word “let.” The focus of “trying” is the Self (Ego), while the focus of “letting” or “allowing” is the Higher Self, that piece of us that is connected to God (or whatever one decides to call that Power/Concept). And for me, that’s all the difference in the world. My Self creates destruction wherever it directs its attention; my Higher Self creates Peace and Joy.
Willpower for me is worse than useless; Willingness is the key.
About the Law of Attraction: What if what we want is unethical or immoral or would cause unhappiness to someone else? Does our "Willingness" still work -- or are we perhaps too Ego-focused and not acting according to the Higher Self?
I'm still chewing on some of this stuff, but as near as I can tell, the less your intentions and activities are in line with the universal principles I've described (Honesty, Compassion, Kindness, Generosity etc.), the more you will "vibrate" at low levels, and draw low-level things into your life. So although the Law of Attraction still works, you draw terrible things to YOURSELF. Even monetary wealth drawn in this way tends to backfire.
Actually the same thing goes with people who whine: e.g., "I can't find a boyfriend" or "I hate being alone." They're FOCUSING on what they DON'T want, and drawing it to themselves. The best way I have found to understand this is that when you say "I want a boyfriend," you are stating your reality into the Universe (that you are perpetually in "want" of a boyfriend), and the Law of Attraction dutifully brings the reality of your wanting a boyfriend into existence, that is, you never find one.
I don't understand this. Let's say, for the sake of argument only,
that I want a boyfriend. What would be my strategy using the Law
of Attraction? Didn't that guy you described in your blog "want" the
car that he got? I'm not trying to be a jerk -- I have a feeling you
understand the complicated distinctions here. Can you explain them to
me?
From the perspective of the Law of Attraction, I believe the answer is to focus on what you want as if you already have it. So if you focus on “I HAVE the boyfriend of my dreams” convincingly, you begin aligning your thoughts and emotions properly. All that’s left is to align your actions (e.g., go to parties, mixers, or public places where you can actually meet people in their native habitat), and you will draw what you now know you already have.
In his book Harmonic Wealth, James Ray describes an exercise that perhaps answers this question even more clearly, in this specific context. He suggests that we write down every single aspect of our perfect mate on paper: hair color, eye color, complexion, build/physique, emotional attributes, personality characteristics, occupation, etc. Then we go right down the list, one by one, focusing on each attribute and identifying a person in our life who possesses that specific attribute. When we have finished the list, we have proven to ourselves beyond a doubt that these characteristics already exist in our sphere of influence. Now we know we already have what we want, and can just be grateful. As I understand it, Gratitude (one of the universal principles) is a tremendously attractive force, and accelerates the Law of Attraction. With the alignment of thoughts and passion created by the exercise, the appropriate action will then allow these attributes to “coalesce” into a single person.
As you know, I’m single (actually, happily single). So I can’t prove this works from personal experience. But I am leaning toward believing that it might, if I gave it an honest try.
Great questions! Thanks! Got any more? Send them on! It really helps me to chew on this stuff.
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